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Like most vulgar expressions of the more decorous—at least publicly—pre-Internet era, the phrase’s origin is difficult to ascertain.Google Books, which searches an extensive digitized catalog, shows a printed debut in 1971 in , a book by Earl Wilson, a gossip columnist who was known for exposing JFK’s broad interpretation of his marital vows.Our tool avoids what the conventional wisdom of the past has dictated—the 4% rule.This is what author Lee Eisenberg used for a worksheet that purported to deliver what he called “the New York Number,” a concept similar to “f–k you money,” but for living in New York City.For a more precise calculation, however, you have to account for inflation, which reduces your purchasing power over time.On the upside, you should also account for the money you could make by investing the nest egg you’ll be tapping over your 50-year retirement. Nobody gives a fuck that Elon musk is working 100 hours a week, and that Marissa Mayer pulling in a 130 hour work week while still breastfeeding her newborns. You should celebrate any day that you don’t have to sell off another part of your company. Fuck you for telling me that TV is a waste of time but you’re all about the Netflix and chill. And I never got a compilation error on a white board, when I need a hash set in Java I just use Hash Set- I don’t fucking care about the complexity of this code block because I can afford another EC2 instance! Everyone there is the CEO of something-something and they’re all building a MVP to disrupt the who gives a fuck market and that hockey-stick growth is guaranteed. Fuck your noise cancelling headphones and Pomodoro timers, your fucking to-do lists, apps, notes, sticky notes, and God knows what else. Robot is kind of like you, because you like to geek out on that shit. Keep laughing about how HBO’s Silicon Valley is realistic instead of asking why. I never had to shift a bit in a C array in my life! Fucking DAU’s, WAU’s, MAU’s, ARPU, LTV, CPM, CPI, CPC, PPC, CPA, CTR, SEO, ASO, Yo Y, Wo W, Fuck over Fuck. And the fucking networking events, my fucking lord.

You try to make me feel bad because I woke up at 6AM.

Do me a favor, put your fucking Mac away and go play with your kids. Please stop celebrating every fucking imaginary milestone with whisky, beer, or pizza and beer. Oh, OK, I’ll come work for you because you have the Glenlivet 17 and not the 15. Fuck your eating disorders, why the fuck does everything have to be so extreme with you? Fuck your standing desk, exercise ball desk, laying desk, and treadmill desk. Let me repeat that -NO ONE CAN FUCKING READ THAT FAST. Fuck your references to Malcolm Gladwell and Dan Ariely, and stop fucking quoting Lean Startup, for Christs sake. Fuck “entrepreneurs” nowadays, seriously- Everybody is a fucking entrepreneur now. Fuck your feature flags and endless variants in your A/B testing.

You’re not Elon Musk- you ain’t Marissa Mayer, you’re not going to get to space, and you won’t build the next Space X. Fuck your open space floor plans- You really think Zucks builds Facebook’s 2017 roadmap while a nerf war is raging outside? Fuck working out of garages and fuck your 2.5 square meters “workspace”. Fuck the transparency trend, the post mortem and the 5 whys. Fuck having a Design sprint in EVERY sprint, pushing to production 100 times a day, using no staging environment and building a micro services architecture.

For example, if you want to storm out of your office at 40 and plan on living another 50 years with ,000 in annual walking-around money, simple arithmetic indicates you’ll need million.

It’s a ton, to be sure, but it’s not Vanderbilt money.

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